We’ve all been there—moments when something our partner says or does rubs us the wrong way. We want to speak up, but it either comes out in a way that starts a fight, or we swallow it down to “keep the peace,” only to feel more distant and resentful later.

Enter the Feedback Wheel, one of the most practical communication tools I’ve ever come across—taught by Terry Real, the founder of Relational Life Therapy (RLT). It’s a simple but powerful four-step method that helps you share how you feel without triggering defensiveness, criticism, or shutdown. In fact, it’s designed to make it easier for your partner to hear you—and to keep connection intact even in hard conversations.

When tension spikes in a relationship, it's easy to get swept up in the heat of the moment. Words fly. Voices rise. Walls go up. And suddenly, instead of being a team, you're two opponents in a ring—both trying to win, and both bound to lose.

In Relational Life Therapy (RLT), renowned therapist Terry Real teaches a simple but powerful skill to interrupt this destructive cycle: the Responsible Time Out.

Let’s break down what that is—and how to use it effectively in your own relationships.

Fairy tales may have led us to believe in the elusive "happily ever after," but real-life relationships often unfold in a more complex narrative. Normal marital hatred, the kind that arises when the honeymoon phase wanes, might seem like a cause for concern, but in reality, it's a natural part of the intricate dance that is marriage. In this post, we'll explore why we shouldn't be scared of these moments of discord and how they can actually contribute to the growth and resilience of a relationship.